Co-Worker Luncheon

"Hey Billy, my front desk man. Want to go grab a bite with some of us more important employees?"
"Why yes, you oh so important co-worker. I would love to walk to a pizza place and listen to you complain about how you haven't gotten laid for a couple weeks, and how your boss doesn't respect you."

Of course, this situation hasn't come up in my work place, but I'm sure you can understand it. We all pretend to be on big happy family in the office, but really we aren't. We only get to see what others tell us about themselves, so honestly, how do we know what's truth and what's bull? For all I know, my coworkers could all be part of an elaborate spider breeding cult that has plans to take over the world with millions of tiny militia bugs. However, I doubt it based on the intelligence level they exude.

No, we aren't friends. I don't spill out information to them, and they only brag if they feel threatened. So we all sit around, smiling, nodding, laughing, wondering when the stories will end, and that's OK because as we walk back from lunch we are full of pizza and fake camaraderie that keeps us all at a safe distance: our respective desks.